Submission
Individuals with a Goal of Submission idealize some person or task by making it bigger than they are. They are then able to focus their energy on fulfilling the dream of this possibility by doing everything both possible and practical to make it more attainable. Unfortunately, most of the ideals people with a Goal of Submission have are likely to be larger Goals that seem unattainable on an individual level. For example, many individuals with a Goal of Submission want to eliminate conflict in the world or, like my mother, wake people up to the joy of running. Other individuals with a Goal of Submission define themselves in trying to serve a partner that they feel deserves their support. This is why Submission is so paired with Dominance, because usually those they submit to have a Goal of Dominance.
The primary purpose here is to experience the satisfaction of stepping beyond their own personal objectives and embracing how serving others can actually end up serving them in the end. By placing something in front of our own Goals, we are forced to stretch ourselves to see how being there for others is a step in the process of being there for ourselves. One of the biggest challenges is not to deny or discount ourselves in the process. If we end up neglecting ourselves, we have no capacity to keep serving others. Instead, we try to find a way that serving others can serve us as well. Many people with a Goal of Submission come to this understanding in themselves after considerable adversity. While it is easy to believe that individuals with a Goal of Submission have been subjugated into this possibility, this is not the case unless it is imprinting.
Individuals with a Goal of Submission are extremely devoted to possibilities outside of them and see it as a transformative process to grow by using others or ideals as a leverage point to exceed their own expectations and beliefs. When individuals overdo their Goal of Submission they can seem subservient, helpless, dependent, victimized and martyred. These experiences indicate that they are trying to do too much too quickly. When they are able to pace themselves effectively, they are more sensitive, selfless and dedicated to growth in such a transpersonal way that it is commonly inspiring to others to see them taking action in such a selfless manner. This Goal is one-on-one oriented and focused on the action modality so that it is always about doing something to improve the situation.
Individuals who become overly Submissive can actually become Dominant in doing so. This occurs when an individual becomes so fixated on an objective that nothing can stand in the way of accomplishing it. While an individual with a Goal of Submission can temporarily become Dominant, it is not pleasing to that person because it makes them uncomfortable when they are seen as being in charge. They are the best followers and consider themselves the worst leaders. Usually they only become the leader in a default situation when there are no others who want to be leaders available. In the U.S. approximately 10% of the population have a Goal of Submission. Some of these individuals are mistaken for Servers, which is a slightly different expression. On the other hand a Goal of Submission is very complementary to being a Server.
Individuals who are imprinted to be Submissive focus on superficial activities where others define what needs to be done. They appear to be helpless to change their situation and yet they seem “undevoted” in terms of implementing anything to change the circumstances. People with a natural goal of Submission have a transpersonal way of being that is open and receptive to others. Individuals who are imprinted with Submission are typically closed down and unresponsive to others and feel tapped by the circumstances to act out whatever is expected. This means that those with an imprint of Submission believe they have to conform to what others tell them to do and believe that everyone has to play by the rules for things to work. There is no focus on improvement, either personally or with others when it is imprinting.
An individual authentically embodying the goal of submission experiences a sense of service to others. Others experience their commitment and dedication to a higher possibility, and feel supported by their presence. An individual with submission imprinting isn’t open to serving others, and instead seeks to look he or she cares, without having to become aligned to others where they are. Imprinted submission is self-involved and paradoxically selfish in its nature. This runs counter to the way these individuals try to present themselves, in that they are always complaining about how they have to sacrifice or perform for others. The irony is that the more they act externally as helpful and idealistic, the more others, taking them at their word, give them things to do which they end up hating.
Primary Contribution—To develop themselves and experience satisfaction by serving a person, group, or cause; placing it in front of everything else.
Responsive characteristics—Devoted, caring, helpful, sensitive, selfless, dedicated, loyal.
Primary Issue—To serve the person, group or cause without neglecting themselves. The situation needs to be “win/win.”
Reactive characteristics— Subservient, helpless, dependent, martyred, victimized.
Identifying Characteristics—Natural followers, visionary, active.
Percentage of population with this goal: 10%.
Examples
Marie Osmond - Singer, TV Personality, (acceptance and growth imprinting)
Ayatollah Khomeni - Leader of Iran (dominance and discrimination imprinting)
Mia Farrow - Actress (acceptance and growth imprinting)
Leonard Nimoy- Actor, Director, and Author (discrimination and dominance imprinting)
Joan Baez- Folk Singer (growth and dominance imprinting)
Paul Simon- Singer and Songwriter (growth and dominance imprinting)
Princess Diana- (growth and acceptance imprinting)
Terry Cole -Whittaker, Minister (acceptance and growth imprinting)
Nancy Reagan - Actress, First Lady (dominance and discrimination imprinting)
Joan of Arc- (dominance and acceptance imprinting)
Mother Theresa - (acceptance imprinting)