A fter you receive an assessment for you and your partner, comparing each of the factors will lead you to some in-depth understanding of differences. For example, one person may be fast-paced while another is slow-paced. One partner may be a Convergent Decision Maker with Divergent Imprinting while the other may be a Divergent Decision Maker with Convergent Imprinting. Understanding the meaning of this can first, lead you to the website where you read about it and then, to a coach to confirm your understanding of the differences.

Some people have enough Imprinting to be confused about which pattern they are. We have constructed the following questions to help individuals confirm their natural compatibility patterns. While this will not alleviate all the confusion, it will empower individuals to go deeper and watch their own responses to see what the patterns are. The confusion will eventually be eliminated when we heal how we have been compromised by others and forgive them for whatever parts they may have played in our adapting to them in a way that did not work for us. It should be noted that most of these compromises were not done to us intentionally, as the main objective was to help children be as successful as they could be.

The following questions are provided to help individuals work through the process of determining the truth about their patterns. Coaches will refer you to this section when you have questions about which options seem more authentic to you. Since we have a lot of Imprinting, Pretenses and Defenses that confuse the situation, we are attempting to provide the best set of questions for doing this self-assessment. Until we accept a particular pattern and can respond in a flowing way that serves and supports us, it is likely we still have work to do in clarifying our Compatibility Factors. Our Coaches will occasionally use these questions to get to the root of particular conflicts that lie within.

If you would like to learn more about each of the Compatibility Factors listed here, there is much more information in the Factors section of this website.

Primary Expression

Primary Creative Expression is the context of our being where we recognize that it is the quality of our nature that makes us great, not how we relate, or what we do. When we actualize our Primary, we learn how to relate our Primary to the needs of others, which produces a direct response from us. The more we respond to this possibility, the more value we produce for others. It is not about delivering a solution, but rather about being the solution. What seems natural to us can be revolutionary to others. What we encourage individuals to do is to build their constituencies so that they have a quicker feedback process as to what makes them great. Otherwise, it can take them years to figure out what the benefit is to being around them.

Primary Orchestrator Expression

Primary Compassionates Expression

Primary Implementers Expression

Primary Inventors Expression

Primary Investigators Expression

Primary Visionary Expression

Primary Storytellers Expression

Secondary Expression

This level of expression is all about success and security. It is about what makes us stand out, and therefore, how we can be recognized. This can be either by what we are known for in our career, or what we do to keep from being run over by our career. For example, Inventor Secondaries may seek to travel or do jobs in many different environments to keep from being bored. Implementer Secondaries, who have the opposite nature, may consistently like a 9 to 5 regimen, where they know what they are going to be doing every day. They key is to accept what works for us and determine how to maximize our capacity to contribute what others are looking for. Every Secondary Expression is an attempt to over-identify with the security programs of our personality in order to maintain some degree of relevance.

Secondary Orchestrator Expression

Secondary Compassionates Expression

Secondary Implementer Expression

Secondary Investigator Expression

Secondary Inventor Expression

Secondary Visionary Expression

Secondary Storyteller Expression

Mental Body Expression

Mental Body perspectives are based on what makes us feel safe. This means that we learn from an Instinctive level how others respond and recognize how to manage the process so we are not at the effect of the circumstances. Sometimes we do this by diverting the attention to others, or by taking the attention upon ourselves. Usually, the Mental Body Expression is one of the main expressions that we have in common with our parents or family. This means that others, to some degree, accept us for our Mental Body Expression, but also provide a tremendous amount of Imprinting on top of this expression. When this occurs, we could feel trapped in lower level, or negative, expressions. Every Mental Body expression has both positive and negative ways of showing up. At this level, we tend to focus on how not to be impacted by others with the same Creative Mental Body Expression in our families of origin.

Mental Body Orchestrator:

Mental Body Compassionates:

Mental Body Inplementer:

Mental Body Inventor:

Mental Body Investigator:

Mental Body Visionary:

Mental Body Storyteller:

Communication Process

Communications are critical in most relationships. Each person has their own sequence, which is their way of prioritizing what they hear, see and engage. When there are differences in the sequence, miscommunication occurs. On the other hand, individuals with the same sequence can find it effortless to communicate because they do the same process in the same way. Most individuals do not even realize the variety of processing sequences. Some cannot even imagine what it would be like to not think of something, but instead experience it in a body way, or feel it emotionally, without any intellectual structure.

Decision-Making Process

Decision-Making is difficult when individuals are at odds with how to engage a particular set of options. Convergent individuals attempt to organize things for immediate action so that they can be improved as time allows later. Divergent individuals want to examine every possible option before they are willing to make a choice. This means many people find themselves opposing each other, not in terms of the outcome, but in terms of the way they get to the decision. This creates a lack of trust and produces obstacles to regaining that trust.

Pacing

Pacing is a difference based on taking in different amounts of content at different speeds. Some people take large chunks slowly, and others take small chunks of experience quickly. It has nothing to do with intelligence. The net effect of Pacing differences is that fast-paced individuals become frustrated and slow-paced individuals become exhausted when they interact with their counterparts. The big opportunity is to know how long to engage or how to minimize the impact of partners upon us when there are major differences. Otherwise, we fall into co-dependent enmeshment patterns and become victims of circumstances.

Defensive Style

Defenses are the most complex environmentally constructed Compatibility Factor there is. The more we believe in Defenses and identify with them, the more we are trapped in Defensive thinking. This prevents us from expressing our Creative Nature. It also greatly reduces the choices we can engage because we are fearful about many of the options. It is only by healing ourselves and releasing any past trauma that we step out of our Defensive nature and begin to define ourselves in terms of our Creative Being. This takes being able to see ourselves as both masculine and feminine and interact with others in a much more flexible and empathic way.

WorldView

WorldView is the most underrated and misunderstood Compatibility Factor. It reflects common lessons and a similar context when it is the same between people. There is a greater capacity to meet individuals where they are and be able to relax with them to discuss what they want to do. We develop greater facility with different WorldViews as we learn how to engage other WorldView levels by simplifying, or shrinking, our Context to match what they need. This makes it easier to deal with individuals who do not have as high a WorldView as us, and more difficult to deal with individuals with a higher WorldView. This is the only factor that contains this hierarchical orientation. What we try to focus on is the differences and increasing complexity that can be found in higher WorldView individuals, rather than make them better than anyone else.

Effective Birth Order

Birth Order is one of those items where we create behavior patterns around certain niches in our family of origin that we perpetuate in our choice of partners and in our interactions with others. It is not a large influence, but it is completely predictable that individuals with odd birth order numbers are attracted to people with even birth order numbers and vice versa. We also tend to choose individuals who mirror our closest sibling number. This Factor is actually becoming less useful over time because of the increasing predominance of mixed and merged families.

Pretenses

Pretenses are ways we try to get attention, falsely believing that our way of being is actually supporting others. The more we are doing Pretenses, the more naturally we are self-serving and selfish. The worst Pretense is Seduction, which we definitely want to avoid in others. Otherwise, we will find ourselves naked in the jungle with a sharp stick, not knowing how we got here. The more Pretenses we do, the more out of touch we are with our Creative Nature. This is because we are so caught up in, and concerned about, what other think of us, that we have no time to consider how we might contribute in the world.

BodyType

Everyone has two to four BodyTypes, which anchor our Authentic Life Expression. Our BodyTypes are our physical grounding for how we manifest our life work into the world. Therefore, just by looking at BodyTypes, we have a much greater appreciation of the capacity of an individual. What we are comparing is the potential they have based on their BodyType, versus how they have defined themselves intellectually and intuitively as a force in the world. For example, a great ballerina will not necessarily show up with a Sporty Action, Quiet Authority, and Inner Brilliance BodyType, unless they have some major repression or body dysmorphia (eating disorder). It would be much better for a ballerina to have a Speedy Communicator, Quiet Authority, with a touch of Radiant Healer and Sporty Action, and they are Feel, Act, Think in their Communication Process. That will activate the small amount of Sporty Action in the appropriate manner. The more we understand our own BodyTypes, the more we see how this plays with our natural contributions and the people we are making the contribution to. It is ironic that so many people get hung up on BodyType preferences, which have really nothing to do with attractiveness, at least in the way they imagine. This is because we have so much Objectification going on about BodyTypes.

Goals

Goals are the way we aspire to accomplish something. Each is a process or methodology that is second nature to us. While many individuals believe that Growth is a universal goal, it is actually only well-implemented by less than 20% of the population. Just as many people grow by being in a goal of Acceptance, Dominance, or even Discrimination. What this teaches us is that the method of growth can be expressed very differently. For example, in a Goal of Discrimination, the way we grow is to question the decision making process until it becomes more clear, refined and reflects our ultimate intention.

Modes

Modes are ways we have of accomplishing our Goals. Each sequence of Modes is a unique expression that is a tried and true way for us to address issues. When others understand our Modes, they know how to interact with us to forward the process. When they do not, they are always doing things that feel sabotaging to us.

Attitudes

Attitudes are perspectives we have where we fix ourselves in a time frame, not realizing that others may operate differently. This creates people we seem to flow with and people who have animosity towards us, even thought we did not do anything to them.

Imprinting

Imprinting is important because it distorts and limits the expression of our Authentic Creative Being. When we are Imprinted, we over-identify and fixate on how we can prove ourselves to others at the cost of actually being who we are. Each of the imprints discussed below are problems when we are not actually that expression. Even if we are that expression, it becomes hard for us to be naturally true to ourselves because how our parents did this expression is usually very different than how we would do it.
Orchestrator Imprinting

Compassionate Imprinting

Implementer Imprinting

Inventor Imprinting

Investigator Imprinting

Visionary Imprinting

Storyteller Imprinting

Conclusion

We hope these questions are effective in clarifying the Higher Alignment patterns. While this does not deal with every possible contingency, it does deal with the most common 80% of the issues. If you have not had a Creative Assessment done, we recommend that you do one now because there are always things we do not consider when doing a self-assessment. Each Full Creative Assessment also contains information on our Defensiveness and Distortions, which individuals are rarely able to do accurately on themselves. Another major benefit is being able to get a modality assessment regarding the strength of our Sensations, Feelings, Emotions and Thoughts. Eventually, we will be upgrading this section to delineate which Modalities we are underdoing, overdoing, or are balanced in.